This picture makes me feel a lot of things, much like to the two previous portraits I've taken in this series. I embarked upon another Whole 30 in the month of October in an effort to take back my relationship with food and how I approach my meals, how I feel about my body, and how I want to live out my life in the realm of dieting or not dieting. This Whole 30 has been probably the easiest round that I've done. If you don't know what a Whole 30 consists of...you do not eat any grains, sugar, alcohol, legumes, or dairy for 30 days. I've completed one other in its entirety and have tried to do a few others but never made it fully to the end. With this one though, I had an accountability group with two other gals that I've known for a long time. We would text each other usually about every day with how we were doing. They weren't doing the Whole 30 but some variation of healthy eating, gluten free, etc. It was nice to have that accountability. The other thing that helped me so much was my Instant Pot. Cheesy, I know....but meal prepping was soooo, soooo much easier this time around with that awesome tool.
When I look at this photo though I see a mom that is tired. I want a piece of cheese and some wine to go with it. Perhaps a big piece of chocolate. I'm sick of eating the chicken in the dish on the table, the same chicken that I burnt almost to the point of no return the night before. I ate a lot of meat with a lot of mustard over the past 30 days and I was pretty much over it. But, I also feel like super woman on day 30 of the challenge. I feel like I can take on the world and my jeans fit better. I like the person that is looking back at me in the mirror in the morning even when I don't have make up on and I have bed head to last for days.
It's lunch on Halloween day. There's too much chocolate already in the house that's constantly a temptation. I am on the home stretch right before nap time and quiet time when I will be able to have some peace and quiet if only for a little while. This is usually the point when the kids are tired and irritable. I work to get Marin to eat the crust of her sandwich and most of the time Sully sits in my lap because he's fussy and getting ready for a nap.
I feel empowered in this photo even without make up on and in my yoga pants. I eat my burnt chicken with a determination. I try to be a better mom and not spend my days just being exhausted and frustrated when my preschooler challenges me and refuses to be a good listener. I feed our son from my body and help him grow big and strong.
This was me in October of 2017.
Portrait Three.
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