Hurry Up & Wait

Nobody really prepares you for parenthood. It’s almost like there’s this elite club of parents that have been in the trenches and they remain silent.  Everyone figures everything out as they go. Not very many people really talk about the pain of childbirth or the sleepless nights. It’s more of a “oh, you’ll see” mentality. I don’t think that’s necessarily bad, but why the distance between those last few days of being pregnant and then being thrown head first into parenthood, completely unprepared and unbalanced?

You can read the books. You can read the blogs. You can have the conversations with other parents. But, I don’t think it will ever really prepare you for what lies ahead. I haven’t even experienced any of it yet. I’m still pregnant as I sit and write these words. I’m ready to be on the other side and to wander aimlessly through this thing called parenting. There are just so many opinions about everything, it becomes difficult to wade through most of them and determine what will work best for you and your family.

I also have spent many selfish moments wondering if I am losing pieces of myself in the process of parenthood. My nights have been filled with dreams about playing music and forgetting how to play my own songs, panicking when I can’t fit a guitar around my pregnant belly, or forgetting every little thing I have fought for to play music and play in bands over the years. I just don’t want to let go of it. Nor do I really think I will have to, but it will look different.

I want to be a mom and I want to still be me. I wonder if that is completely possible. I hope so. I want parenthood to be just another facet of who we are as individuals and as a couple, another extension of our lives that has been dormant until now. I want it to be the missing puzzle piece that we weren’t fully aware that we needed until now.

I want to play rock n’ roll. Loudly.

I want to take photos and capture moments that otherwise would disappear.

I want to drink a good beer and discover new places.

I want to help a child grow up strong and beautiful. I want her to know of all of the things that she can dream of and accomplish.

I want to fall more in love with my man every day.

I am due in 2 days. I am unsure of when she will actually arrive, but now we hurry up and wait.

Hurry up.

And wait.

Friday Night

The guys and I played a show this weekend at Road 34, a local bicycle bar in town. We tend to gig here a lot just because I dig the atmosphere and vibe of it all. The turn out was great. We played for a "Chicks that Rock" night. 3 bands with women for frontmen. Frontmen? Is that what you would call that? Frontwomen?  Either way, it's always immensely refreshing to find other women that play music like we do. 

I love being able to play shows and just let go, doing something I love. 

You can listen to some of our music here. 

Breaking the Silence

It has been nearly three months since I have written here. I believe I have enough legitimate excuses to suffice for my absence in the passing days.

Case and point.

We bought a house. A real house. It boggles my mind. I feel so grown up.

Today, on this glorious Saturday, my band and I are releasing our new record, Bend or Break.

You can buy it here ! Or read a review about it here....

We have a band practice at our new abode nearly every night during the week due to all of the bands I participate in.

We have a cat. Never thought I would say that. He’s a pain, but we love him. I’ve come to the realization though that even though the kitten stage is adorable and all, I’m ready for the old, fat cat stage where they just chill and don’t crawl all over us and claw at everything in their path. (I’m a dog person. That is what I know. This is welcomed, new challenge that has sent my nose running and my eyes itching.)

Since this is turning into a “Summary of Our Lives Right Now,” I'll continue.......

I need to travel. I never have. I feel it burning in my bones. Even a simple road trip. Even a day trip for crying out loud. Or Europe. Which ever one comes first.

I’m currently obsessed with interior design blogs and all of the cheap, crafty like a fox ways I’m going to transform our house into something awesome. It’s slowly getting there.

I still have two rooms to unpack. Still.

My camera is broken. We’re hoping it’s an easy fix, but as of now, I’m scheming through all of the ways to get my hands on a Cannon 5d mkII, aside from stealing one of course. :)

We are a part of THIS and that make me very happy.

I’m trying to take much better care of myself...one day at a time. Jillian Michaels and I have become imaginary pals and enemies all at the same time. She kicks my butt.

I’m going to stop there. Hopefully in the coming days I will actually write more. I’ve been inspired a lot lately and I will hopefully post about that, maybe even some recipes or DIYs.

Today is a glorious day.

FINAL NOTE: SORRY FOR ALL OF THE IPHONE PHOTOS. ICK.

Bookstores and Chai

This day has been lazy, extremely lazy.

I played a show last night at the beloved Coffeetree/Anthology Bookstore. It was a grand time. I introduced a few new tunes and even threw in a Christmas song. It was really fun! I like when shows are enjoyable and it doesn't feel like work. That's the way it is supposed to be. Hopefully I'll have some photos soon....cause this was taken by a phone! :)

I slept in this morning til around 11 or so, stayed in my pjs until about 3:00, then went to B&N with my wonderful husband to spend some gift cards we've received for Christmas. There are few things I truly adore in life.....love, the church, music, rain, bookstores, photography, vinyl, etc. Add a tall chai into the equation and I'm set for an evening of pure enjoyment. We scored a lot of good reads that I can't wait to delve into.

The Hollens also gave us some more ornaments for our tree this year that I'm ecstatic about. They are the perfect color. They gave us two hearts and another that says Christmas 2009. It is our first Christmas as a married couple and these are perfect. (Sidenote...our six month anniversary is tomorrow! Time is flying by!)

Ryan has just finished his student teaching portion of his degree and currently is sitting next to me ever so diligently typing his huge assignment for the end of the semester. He even made a little list of to-do's, which I was so proud of. I'm obsessed with lists! I guess I'm rubbing off on him! :)

I'm also currently obsessed with THIS blog. The idea of being able to take an entire year to discover more about your marriage and travel all over the country is incredibly appealing. And, you get to travel with one of these puppies! I like this one....

Crazy, Crazy, Crazy Good Weekend

This weekend has been nothing short of enjoyable and purely amazing. It began on friday for me.

I had one of my firsts as a musician. My first radio show. I was featured on the local college radio station, KCSU 90.5 with DJ Tasty. I was quite nervous, but it was really fun. He asked me a bunch of questions, played a few songs off of my last record, and had me play two newer songs live.

Then, another cool thing, my husband went and bought a guitar. His dad is so cool too, he threw in a fender acoustic amp as well. The hubby is now in gear heaven and has an acoustic guitar to call his very own.

We then went and saw this movie. Jack White will forever be the man.

Saturday began with another amazing time. We went into Pigpen Studios to start recording a brand new project. It already sounds amazing. The day couldn't have gone better. I love being able to play music that I love, with people that I love. We will being going back in a month to track a few more songs. It's happening, it's all happening.

I truly love my life.

Crisis

I'm going through a sort of blog crisis. I seriously change how it looks every time I look at it. It's mildly frustrating. I'm also behind on my 365 days challenge....maybe I should do a photo a week or something, since I've been so horrible at it so far. Pull yourself together!!!

But, alas, I worked out tonight and feel really good about myself, which is lovely. I also get to learn how to crochet tomorrow which I'm entirely stoked about.

I spent most of my day in Denver at a work conference, which wasn't as great as I expected to be. But, being a big city makes me realize how much I miss this big city.

Portland, you will always be close to my heart.

As much as I love Colorado and living in a college town, I will always be a big city girl. Someday. Even just for a visit, I shall return with my wonderful husband.

I'm thinking of doing a 365 days of photos things again. I started it a couple years ago and did really well for a while then I moved and life became pure chaos. Here's something to start off the goal of a photo today, well two photos for today.

Last night, we began practicing for the studio. Next weekend on Oct 17th, we will be heading into the studio to track two songs, called Thunder and So Very. I'm very excited. I plan on releasing a four to five song ep in the next few months, Lord willing and the creek don't rise. I'm not playing a ton of shows for the next few months, which leaves me with more time to figure out what I really want or even need musically, some new, cool merch, a new record (EP), and what my life will look like musically in the future. I'm to the point where I really have no idea, but I'm ok with that. I'm just so glad I'm along for the killer ride.

Some photos from practice....

Today, we also got the first snow of the season. I don't know if I'm quite ready for that yet. You might not be able to see the flakes in the photo, but it was pretty crazy! Nothing stuck to the ground. I want more fall, not winter quite yet!

Away

I've been away... really I've just neglected this poor little blog. I have a lot of catching up to do.

To begin with: A Weekend Recap

Friday:

My wonderful husband and I played a show in Greeley at this amazing venue called Zoe's. I couldn't believe that a place as rad as that could be located in Greeley, CO! It was such an encouraging show, full of good community and artistic inspiration. We got to play with a lovely lady, Annie Brooks. She was so wonderful.

I love walking away from a night of music with so much inspiration and encouragement.

That being said, I have so many sweet ideas for some merchandise that will hopefully become a part of my shows! More on that later...I'm exctied!! Tshirts, buttons, stickers, a new record in the works!!!

Saturday:

My awesome sister and I met up for an afternoon of thrifting. We found a couple of absolutely amazing stores that I didn't know existed in Old Town. The first is right on College and benefits local charities. I found a dress for work and a red purse that holds more than enough of my world in it. We then went to another store called Clothes Mentor. I thought that I had died and gone to professional clothing heaven. It is all previously worn, inexpensive, and purely awesome. I walked away with a few more dresses for work. Then we went to a few flea markets and I found an amazing suitcase to put all of my merchandise for shows in.

Such a good day.

Sunday:

I spent most of the day enjoying rain, drinking apple cider, and working on my 2010 planner.

I'M ON THE RADIO!

Yesterday, our friend told me that she had heard my song on the local college radio station. I've also heard the station play two different songs of my mine as well today! It's a strange feeling to hear yourself on the radio, even if it is just a local college radio station. 

Help me out! Go request to hear Baily Stauffer played on KCSU of Fort Collins. It would mean the world to me! 

Request Here!

10 Things I Love

I read a lot of different blogs throughout the week. Many of them I come across do a post along these lines....10 Things I Love Sunday, Monday, Etc. So I thought I would join the bandwangon and see if I can keep up weekly. So, without further adieu,   10 Things I Love Today.....

1. Iced Soy Mochas, from this local shop of heaven. 

2. The fact that this chick is our friend, was in our wedding, and has become a youtube phenomena songwriter. 

3. The idea of learning how to knit. My mom is part of a group of girls who get together to knit and crochet once a week. I think I might look into that. 

4. Moleskin Notebooks. I'm obsessed with writing down my life's story in these. It just feels right. 

5. These clothes  from Forever 21. I need to take a road trip to this store and spend some money! (As you can see, I don't wear a ton of color.) 

        

6. The latest season of The Office is out on DVD. Since we don't have cable, we just wait for the latest one on DVD to come out. I hadn't realized how much I missed this hilarious show. 

7.  Zooey Daschenel. Seriously. Anything this girl touches I will see or listen to. I love that she sings in almost all of her movies and has killer style. 

8. Playing solo shows. I forgot how difficult they were, but I really miss doing them. Last night was wonderful. I love connecting with people about life and songwriting. 

9. Playing keys in this band of amazing gentleman. 

10. The fact that this keyboard is now officially mine. We sent in the last payment this week. 

Happy Sunday!