A List | 31 Things Before 31

I entered into a new decade on Wednesday. I am no longer in my twenties and I still haven't quite grasped that. A lot happened in my twenties. Heartbreak. Living in the northwest. Going to college. Playing lots of music. Moving home. Meeting Ryan. Marrying Ryan. A few different jobs: coffee houses, churches, a dental office. Playing more music. We bought our first home. We had our first kid. 

Many things can happen in the span of a decade. Now I find myself in a fresh one, untouched and totally unknown. The idea of being in my thirties is actually pretty appealing. I'm ready for a fresh start, a clean slate. In some ways, I feel like I need to be a real adult now. In other ways I feel like I never will be and that's totally alright. 

Every year for the past few years, I've written a list around my birthday. This list consists of many things that I want to accomplish in the new year in front of me. Last year, I did alright with my list but didn't accomplish quite a few of them. You can see the list here....30 Things Before 30.  It's no secret that I love making lists and I love making this list every single year. I'm excited for what 30 holds. So many things in our lives feel like they are currently in transition. I'm sure I will move into 31 in a totally different place. 

Below is my brand new list. Fresh and new. 31 things before I turn 31.....

1. Read 31 books.

2. Start blogging again.

3. Get pregnant with #2.

4. Paint the outside of our house.

5. Embrace a side hustle.

6. Play a show.

7. See the ocean.

8. Make a big purchase with cash.

9. Get another tattoo.

10. Get a facial.

11. Grow Hollen Photography.

12. Get a deep tissue massage.

13. Redo our basement: paint everything, new flooring, doors, etc. 

14. Finish a song. 

15. Go to a drive-in movie. 

16. Start writing a book. 

17. Thrift more. 

18. Increase our curb appeal.

19. Travel somewhere new. 

20. Build up an emergency fund. 

21. Meal plan and decrease our grocery budget. 

22. Purge the entire house, every room!

23. Develop a product or new venture.  

24. Get family pictures taken. 

25. Complete another Jazzercise attendance challenge. 

26. Have a No-Spend Month. 

27. Read the Dark Tower Series, Harry Potter Series, and Anne of Green Gables Series. 

28. Take a class. 

29. Seasonal Fun: pumpkin patch, picking strawberries, the zoo, parades, the fair, etc. 

30. See a show at Red Rocks. 

31. Splurge on the perfect pair of jeans. 

#RESTORE | The 35 Day Jazzercise Challenge

At the end of last year I stepped out of my comfort zone and signed up for Jazzercise. Most people think that is pretty funny but when I show them what a normal class looks like, like the video below, they then understand that I work my booty off in the process and have a lot of fun doing it. No, I don't wear leg warmers. I do try and wear funky patterned pants because that's just how I like to roll. I wanted to find something that challenged me and helped me feel strong. I wanted something that gave me freedom and a desire to get up and workout.

I have loved every single second of my journey so far in the world of Jazzercise. No, I haven't lost the 30lbs that I would love to get off of my frame. No, I'm not a lean twig. But, I feel STRONG. I feel EMPOWERED. I feel like I could take on anything that comes my way. My brain is clearer, my daily life is more determined. I am a better wife, mom, and employee. 

At the beginning of February, my Jazzercise place started a challenge: 30 classes in 35 days. At first I was thinking...." There's no way I can pull that off with my schedule." But, in a fit of craziness, I signed up. My name card hung on the board at class and I started with determination. It was hard, I won't lie about that. I woke up at 4:45am A LOT during this challenge because that was the only time I could make it to class with work and a toddler. In the beginning, I went through and figured out how often per week I would have to go to meet my mark. I needed to go to Jazzercise 6 days a week to make it in 35 days.

AND I DID! 

First day. Of course after the class when I am a sweaty mess.

This was today. The last day of the challenge. Wearing my awesome tank top.

This morning was my last class of the challenge and I proudly accepted the tank top. This tank top is more to me than a piece of clothing. It is a symbol of something that I conquered, something that I didn't think I could do. I truly have NEVER worked out this much in my entire life. 6 days a week for 1 hour a day. That's a lot. 

I could have eaten better and probably would have lost more weight but I lost 6 inches in 30 days. I feel more confident than I ever have before in my mom body. I still have my mom pouch but my clothes are fitting better. 

I have found a strength and passion that I didn't know that I had. The gals at Jazzercise are so encouraging and I love going there. If I am going to get up at the crack of dawn, it better be worth it. And it is! I am even toying with the idea of someday becoming an instructor. We shall see!

This is all part of my effort to RESTORE myself this year. My one little word. Never stop going after your goals. Never stop trying new things and seeking out new experiences. Never stop. You won't be sorry. I am not sorry. I am thankful that I kept going, that I kept moving. I'm not stopping now. 

Marin Turns Two

Last week Marin turned two years old. I cannot quite believe that we have a two year old. The time has gone so quickly. She has a fiery personality, talks non-stop and has a vocabulary that seems pretty large for a gal her age. But, I am partial to that opinion because I will forever believe that my child is super smart and always awesome. 

We had cinnamon rolls for her birthday breakfast. We hung streamers on her door and throughout the house. Family celebrated with us Friday evening and we bought way too much cake. She received so many books, clothes, and money for as swing set once the weather warms up and we can spend our time outside in the backyard. 

Happy Birthday, Little One!

Why Can't We Have It All?

Have you ever just felt sort of stuck? Unsure? Wading through the unknown and wondering what direction you are going and what direction you are meant to go in? 

That’s where I am at right now. I just feel sort of, well…Blah. Everything seems to be normal and boring around these parts and I was longing for something to shake me out of this funk. I thought some changes at work would do the trick and I feel like I fell short on that one. It wasn’t quite what I was hoping for but I know that God has a plan through that whole situation and I just need to trust Him and not just trust what I think is best for us. I hate lessons like that sometimes. This grand thing is sitting right in front of you and you are longing to just dive in and get to work and then it’s like…. “Welp, you’re doing a great job but not enough to get what you really desire. Keep trucking along!” Hooray. Hooray. I will continue to work to the best of my ability, that is to be sure. 

Then I begin to start feeling selfish and stupid because I do have a great job, we do have a great house, we have a wonderful family, we can pay our bills. Is it wrong to want to succeed? Is it wrong to want to advance in your line of work? Is it wrong that even though I want both of those things, what I really want is to be able to get pregnant again and just raise some babies. But then I hear, deep down inside, the echoes of all of the people along the way that have told me that I would go crazy if I wasn’t working or being a SAHM just isn’t for me…yada, yada, yada. 

Don’t even get me started on how my creative side has fallen pretty much silent, practically dead. I have ideas. I have songs waiting to be sung, waiting to be written. I have books that I want to write. I have projects that I want to create and that I am excited about. I want too many things, it seems. 

Why can’t we have it all? 

There’s really only one thing in the physical sense that is grounding me in this season. As cheesy as it sounds, Jazzercise has really transformed the way I think about myself and my goals. I’m doing a competition right now: 30 classes in 35 days. That means, with my schedule, I have to go Monday-Saturday to Jazzercise. So far, I’m killing it. I woke up at 5am to get to class today. Killing it. I’m going to grasp on to that challenge with everything I have in me for it is keeping me grounded amidst all of the chaos in our lives. 

Sometimes in life we just have to bite the bullet, have the hard conversations, face the disappointments. But, if we are grounded in Jesus and things that make us feel alive, we will find direction even in the chaos. We all go through funks. We all face trials and have triumphs. I want to experience it all on this journey. Sometimes that’s easy, sometimes that’s hard.