Portrait Ten & Eleven

I am always doing some sort of catch up but at least I'm getting these accomplished at some point. They were taken weeks or months ago. These are part of my 32 Things Before 32 List where I set a goal of taking one self-portrait per month. I haven't been very good at it and really don't enjoy taking my own photo but I made this as part of my list because of that. I need to be stretched. I need to be able to capture where I am at in in a certain season of my life. 

The first image feels very veiled to me. In this moment in time I am debating making even more changes in our lives, even more changes than I have already brought about in this past year. Something has been stirring inside of me greatly since I left my job at the church. Something has not stayed quiet and I feel like we have found a new home and community. I realize this is all very vague but I took this photo sitting on our steps in our house after we had just been at church and realizing mid service that we might not be there much longer, at least in the capacity that we have been. That is a big deal and a very big change. It has been hanging on me for months and I feel like we are finally getting to the point of being on the other side. Soon, very soon. 

This second photo was taken in an average hotel room in Montrose, CO on the day of my grandfather's funeral. I was tired, missing our kids, and ready to return back to our lives after traveling Thursday through Saturday, two weeks in a row. But, the fact that Ryan and I were both able to travel to Montrose for the funeral and see our family was a great gift, one I don't take lightly. I was thinking a lot about family and life, as one does when celebrating the life of another. Life really is short and I have no desire to waste my moments that I have with our children, friends, and family. Those things are what really matters. My job won't matter. Our house and cars won't matter. The number in our bank account won't matter or the number on the scale won't really matter. People matter. I need to be reminded of that a lot lately and I am grateful for the reminder. 

Baby Sullivan | Week Forty Eight

I can feel summer inching its way in a lot lately. Our air conditioner has been working overtime the past few days. It's been a hot, sticky kind of heat and I'm never really ready for it once it arrives. I am much more of a fall kind of gal and long for the days of hot coffee, tall boots, and falling leaves. I'm pretty basic like that but I am alright with that. Pretty much just let me live in an episode of The Gilmore Girls during the fall season. I'm set. 

This week has been filled with a few days of work, helping lead worship at church, a garage sale. Marin has lived in every Elsa dress from Frozen that she can get her hands on. I finally had to pry one of the dresses out of her arms just so I could wash it because it was nearing the point of being able to stand up on its own, covered in apple sauce, chocolate milk, and who knows what else. It was getting pretty stinky. We've been re-watching Frozen a lot lately around these parts....that and Finding Dory is a current favorite. 

I've been working with Sullivan still on crawling. We are even at the point where I have placed some puffs just out of his reach in hopes that he will just crawl to get them. The little man loves his food and what better way to get him moving than tempt him with banana puffs. He just looks at me like.."Seriously mom? Not happening. Even for a puff." He is getting there and kind of scoots a little bit, mostly in a backwards direction. It's still a process. 

He is growing at such an alarming rate. I will have a one year old in less than a month and I can hardly believe it. We just moved him up to size 5 diapers. Size 5! I'm not even sure that Marin ever wore size 5 diapers before she potty trained. He's not tiny. That's for sure. 

His new thing is splashing during bath time. It's become kind of an annoyance because we are pretty much completely soaked by the end of the bath. He shares the tub with Marin and we worked really hard at getting her to only make "little splashes." She always says..."Little splashes are okay, Sully. Just little splashes." I know this is a phase and he thinks it's the coolest thing ever but I would prefer to not be soaked by the end of bath time. I usually like bath time. It's one of my favorite times with both of the kiddos. Another work in process. 

This week has me thinking a lot about life and how it can come and go so swiftly at times. My grandfather, my mother's dad, is not doing great health wise and everyday I wake up and pray that he would be comfortable and have peace during this time. I just realized too that he has never met Sullivan and that makes my heart hurt. I think the last time I saw him was a few weeks before Sullivan was born. Visit the ones you love, spend time with them when you are able to because you might not get the chance at some point. That's resting pretty heavy on my heart today. 

Here's Marin at Week Forty Eight.