Baby Sullivan | Week Thirty Five

What a whirlwind of a week. Phew. I feel like we haven't had a moment of calm for many days in our home. We had our cabinets refaced and a backsplash done this week. They just finished yesterday and I am so excited with how it all turned out. But, we were without a kitchen for a week and resorted to eating breakfast in our basement and hanging out at other people's houses. My house needs a really good, deep clean because I feel like there's just a fine layer of dust pretty much everywhere. I've been sneezing like crazy since I woke up this morning and I'm ready to conquer the dust. I am also very ready to get everything put back into our cabinets and bring order into the chaos a bit. 

We also just went through a refinance and everything went smoothly with that. It was pretty comical last night though because they send an agent to your home to sign your final papers. I am knucklehead and decided to schedule this while we didn't have a kitchen and while our kitchen table was in our family room in the basement surrounded my music gear and kid toys. Bless the woman who came to have us sign documents. It was pretty much a hot mess from when she entered our home to when she left. Our living room was full of boxes, our kitchen was a mess. Our children were fussy and hungry. There was a weird smell in the basement. It was definitely not our shining moment as homeowners and as parents. I was looking very forward to getting everything signed and getting her out of our hot mess of a home. It's funning now looking back at it but at the time I wanted to crawl into a hole for a while. 

Sully is working on some new teeth and I can see them getting ready to poke through the gums. He's had a few rough moments this week. I think mostly teeth are to blame but we also were all over the place this week with meals and nap times. I'm looking very forward to getting some consistency back in our schedule this week and to normalize our naps and mealtimes. Both kids were troopers this week and I am thankful for that. Marin probably only napped one day out of seven this past week. I know she fights the nap and most of the time just entertains herself during quiet time. But, the kid still needs a nap sometimes, especially when the world around her is in such upheaval. We had a few rough tantrums this week from her and I know our schedule is to blame. 

Sully tried a few new things this week food wise, even with all of the meal craziness. I found that little dude loves hummus. He also tried a fruit and veggie pouch at the coffeehouse yesterday. He seemed to really like it and I would love the ease of a pouch. He's still been rocking the sweet potatoes and chicken. He love carrots and peas. He eats a lot of bananas and yogurt bites. 

Many things in our lives are changing. I realize that is fairly vague and goes beyond just getting our cabinets redone. I'm trying to grasp all of it and move through a season of change as best as I can. I do believe that the changes at hand are good and I am excited for what may come out of all of it. 

Today, I plan on focusing on the kids schedules and offering some normalcy in their lives. I want to scrub down the house and conquer the dust. I want to cook in my kitchen and clean out the fridge. We definitely need groceries in the next day or so as well. I probably won't even get out of my pajamas and plan to not leave the house unless absolutely necessary. 

I really need to catch up some blog stuff too this week. I need to post my February Portrait. My One Little Word Post. Lots of catching up to be done....

Week Thirty Five. 

Here's Marin at Thirty Five Weeks. 

Baby Sullivan | Week Two

We have survived the first week of newborn life and today marks week two for little Sullivan. I feel like the fog of newborn-ness is wearing off ever so slowly and I'm slowly starting to feel like a human once more. Ever so slowly. 

My healing process has been so different from my birth with Marin. I am definitely not a huge fan of having a c-section. Turns out, I have a little infection and I have been on antibiotics for the past few days. I'm ready to be able to pick up my toddler and vacuum my house. We are slowly getting there but this has been totally different from last time. 

My quiet mornings look quite different now. 

Baby Sullivan is a little champ and I am so thankful for that given the transition from one to two children. Ryan goes back to work on Thursday and I am pretty much trying to slowly figure out how to do life with two kids in tow. It's a totally different ball game. I have a feeling that I will be lucky to get a shower in and eat meals at normal times. Luckily Marin can go to the bathroom pretty much by herself and is fairly independent. We have had some extra tantrums from her lately though and I know she's adjusting to life now just like the rest of us. I keep having to remind myself of that. We are all in transition. We will all be ok. These days are going to pass by so quickly. 

Checking on baby brother

He is eating well and I am super thankful for the fact that he is a good eater. Breastfeeding with Marin was a pretty big struggle for the first month or so. This feels so different from that. We've even had a few longer stretches of sleep at night, only two so far, but I will take what I can get at this point. Any extra sleep I get helps me to not be such a zombie during the day. 

His skin has been freaking out a bit but I feel like it's finally starting to calm down. He's almost lost his umbilical cord and we will give him his first bath soon. He was circumcised a week ago and that is healing up very well.  

Overall, we are all just learning how to do life together as a family of four. I've had to take it slower than I would normally like. Marin is learning how to be big sister and not be the center of attention at all times. We are once again in the learning phase of parenting. We are trying to keep everything resembling some sort of order but sometimes we just need to embrace the chaos. 

I am trying to relax and soak all of my maternity leave in. So much of me still thinks about work and how things are going there. I just need to chill out and focus on where I am. All of this will pass very quickly and I will soon be back to the chaos of work along with two kids. I just keep telling myself...

The days are long but the years are short. 

Soak it in. 

Baby Sullivan. Week two.

Glorified Busyness: Who Are We Trying to Impress Again?

In this very moment, I feel the need to run away from everything or at least take a little break. From motherhood. From a job that is stressing me out so much lately and I feel so much change on the horizon. From the fussy child next to me that is probably teething and might be having a worse go at today than myself. From the bills that need to be paid for the stuff that we don’t really need. From the lack of time. From the lack of freedom. From the lack of passion and creativity. 

Let go my soul, and trust in Him. 

The waves and wind still know His name. 

That is the song currently playing in our little home office. Marin is looking at me as if to say, “Is everything alright, Mom? I’m growing today.” 

It is well. 

With my soul. 

Talk about a gut punch to the heart. A check. A balance. 

Jesus Calling stated this a few days ago: 

Come away with Me for awhile. The world, with its nonstop demands, can be put on hold. Most people put Me on hold, rationalizing that someday they will find time to focus on Me. But the longer they push Me into the background of their lives, the harder it is for them to find Me.  

You live among people who glorify busyness; they have made time a tyrant that controls their lives. Even those who know Me as Savior tend to march to the tempo of the world. They have bought into the illusion that more is always better; more meetings, more programs, more activity. 

I have called you to follow Me on a solitary path, making time alone with Me your highest priority and deepest Joy. It is a pathway largely unappreciated and often despised. However, you have chosen the better thing, which will never be taken away from you. Moreover, as you walk close to Me, I can bless others through you. 

I live my life in my mind between a couple rules of thought, between a couple of ways that I feel my days should be lived out. The whys, hows, whats, and whens are usually around, just hanging out and wondering when I will give them the time of day. We are busy. Our lifestyles are busy. Add a baby into the mix and I can’t wait to finally put my head on my pillow at night, only to be woken up too early the next morning. Change this diaper, nurse the baby, fold the laundry, work on the work project, try and not eat the rest of the donuts in the pretty pink box on the counter, write this blog, make this blog look better, try and sit down to actually play an instrument and finish a song, try and better the world through essential oils, debate if I should be a seller or just use them for my family, realize that I need to share them, work on another side business, edit photos, shoot a wedding...and....and....and...and. That run on sentence only reveals to me the chaos that is our life.

I tend to glorify busyness. It has been a part of my DNA for so long but I want to call it out now. To be done with it. I always have my hands in a million things and I tell myself that it is within the chaos that I thrive. I think I’ve been telling myself that lie for a really long time. Over the last few days I have felt the insatiable need to simplify our lives, to some how go through every room in this house and get rid of all of the stuff that is in the way. I want to simplify our schedule. I constantly feel the need to be knee deep in many business ventures because we need the extra income. I want to dive into those ventures not due to a financial need but for a creative, “I’ll grow from this” need. I’m ready for the hospital bills from having a baby to be done and over with. I am ready to not stress about our finances or making sure the yard looks nice. 

Who are we trying to impress again? Oh, no one? That’s right. 

I want simplicity. I want time spent with Jesus in all of the chaos. 

I am a work in progress. 

Let go my soul, and trust in Him. 

The waves and wind still know His name. 

November Goals

It's been a few months since I've posted my goals for the month. With the holidays swiftly upon us and my favorite time of year right around the corner, I figured some goal making would be a good idea. I need something to keep me in line in the midst of busyness and chaos. 

Organize my song writing situation. 

I have songs recorded on my phone, verses scribbled in notebooks and on napkins. I keep losing songs because I fail to put them down on paper. I don't want those to slip through my fingers so easily. 

30 Day Shred 

We got out of our gym membership due to lack of finances and Mexico will be here before we know it. I need Jillian Michaels to whip me into shape. 

Finish my Christmas shopping

I'm about half way there. 

Do an outfit post on this here blog

 I was going to take photos today of my work outfit but then our lovely cat ripped a big hole in my tights. Whatever good intentions I might have had to grab my camera swiftly disappeared. 

Hello November. You are my favorite time of year. 

Current Chaos

This is where I am at right now. Chaos. Garage sale chaos. At least the craft room/office is starting to actually resemble a craft room/office once more. But, this room? DRIVING ME NUTS. Some of it's staying. Some of it's going. Some of it, I don't know what to do with some of it. 

Progress. Slow progress. Beach House and the new John Mayer record are keeping me company and keeping me sane. 

If I don't post on here for a few days, my hoarder piles might have gotten the best of me. I'm buried somewhere. Send rescue. And ice cream. 

PS. Did you see the new layout? Nice and clean. Chaos free. Now if only my house would feel that way. 

It's going to be one of those weeks...