Baby Sullivan | Week Thirteen

We've had a few runny noses in our home over the past week. Marin stayed home from preschool last Tuesday. Sully is pretty congested. I've been taking vitamin C like it's going out of style. So far, I haven't gotten sick and I'm just hoping and praying it stays that way. Life is way too crazy right now to be sick. I also can't take a lot of medication when I am nursing. I feel like we are finally getting healthy again aside from some pretty raw little noses. 

We did take Marin to the doctor last week and found out that she has an incurable skin condition. I thought she might have a yeast infection but turns out it was something else, something pretty crappy. I have faith that God is bigger than this condition. We are treating it with a creme currently and it seems to be helping. She's not as itchy as before. Sadly though, no more bubble baths. The condition could come and go for the rest of her life. The medical community doesn't have a ton of information on it other than the fact that it is common in girls/boys before puberty or after menopause. It might be due to low estrogen levels. I'm trying to just pray through it and hope for the best. It's pretty sucky. 

On a whim, I decided to try and weigh Sully last week as well. I believe he is just over 16lbs now. This kid just keeps growing. I don't feel like we are feeding him too much but I do tend to feed on demand when I am there. Luckily, he's really tall too so his weight isn't a big concern with the doctors. He's a healthy, growing little guy, that's for sure! 

He's growing so quickly and is so strong already. He's been sitting in a Bumbo chair lately as well. His chubby little thighs almost don't fit in it though. We've been doing lots of tummy time lately too and he gets stronger every day. He's sleeping decently well and wakes usually once a night. 

We've also gotten to the point now with Marin that I believe she is doing away with her naps. (Cue mommy crying in a corner somewhere! Nooooooo!) Those naps are the one thing that has kept me sane in motherhood and that's also a time that I get a lot of work done for my job. So, we've created a compromise. We have gatherered together a number of activities to keep her busy. She can have quiet time in her room instead of taking a nap. She can read books, build with blocks, play with dolls, put together puzzles. If she wants to sleep, she's welcome to. Being the strong-willed child that she is, she always declares that she will not sleep, but she's just going to play. The first day we tried, she spent half of the time pounding on her door and yelling, "Mom! I know you can hear me in the monitor! Mom! I know you can see me in the monitor!" But, overall I think she's starting to look forward to that time now and we get to still stay a little sane. 

Pretty blurry, but I had to get his smile.

Week Thirteen. 

Baby Sullivan | Week Eight

In a few days, we will have ourselves an adorable, chunky, pretty darn awesome two month old. The days pass by so quickly every single week. This week, I finally managed to capture a smile in a photograph! (Thanks Grammy!) 

We also had our first epic diaper blowout. He waited to poop for almost 5 days. I knew it was going to be epic. We ruined his cute outfit and the whole time Marin was by my side talking about how stinky it was. It was stinky. All the way up his backside stinky. Yuck. 

Geoff will never admit it, but he loves babies. 

He has mostly slept through the night lately. We've had a few earlier wake up times to nurse around 3:30am but then we go back to sleep. Lately, when he waits until 4:30am or 5:00am to wake up, I just get up after I nurse him. That's the time I actually get to sit down in my chair, cup of coffee in hand, and have some time to myself. It's glorious. Half of the time it doesn't work out that way...Sullivan doesn't go back to sleep. Marin wakes up early because she's figured out how to set her little alarm clock for 7am. Most of my time in the morning is spent with two children in very close proximity to me. I read my Bible on my phone most days because I have a cuddly baby in my lap and a toddler close by as well. 

I am officially back at work full time on September 10th. I've been working a lot from home the past few weeks but I'm ready to jump in completely. Sunday mornings will definitely be interesting with two kiddos since I am at work by 6:15am. I let Sullivan hang out with the awesome nursery ladies for a while on Sunday and he was a little stud. Total ladies man. He won't be the tough one. Marin still has a hard time right at first whenever she gets to her class. We are working on that one Sunday at a time. We took a break from church for the first chunk of my maternity leave and now I feel like we are back to day one with her strolling right in to her classroom with no tears in sight. 

Marin starts preschool this week. We have a trial run class on Thursday morning but parents are allowed to be there for that class. I cannot believe the school year is already here. We are in a preschool co-op and we get to find out which committee we are on. It's a lot of work but I think it will be worth it in the long run. 

Week Eight. 

Baby Sullivan | Week Five

Week Five, here we are. We made it through the first month of a newborn and a toddler. We made it through the first month of nights with lots of wake up calls, feeling like I'm just simply a milk machine, and learning how to live our lives with two children. 

Little Sullivan is growing like a weed. He eats like a champ, usually every 3 hours or so at the moment. Some nights we only wake once, some nights we wake twice. We gave him his second bath and he just chills while in the tub. He naps decently well and I have no idea how I'm going to function in reality once he doesn't just eat and sleep all of the time. 

Marin is still adjusting but loves her little brother. She always asks to hold him and kisses his little fuzzy head when I'm nursing. We've had our share of tantrums lately but overall she is adjusting well to being a big sister. As long as I rope her in to help, we seem to be doing well. As I said in the past few weeks, having family take her for extended periods of time to get her out of the house has been a life saver. She has started mimicking me when I nurse with her bunny Bernie and a little nursing pillow. Our kids are always watching us. It's adorable. 

I go back to work from home, part time next week. This is my last week of total freedom and hardly any responsiblities. Part of me is ready to transition back into something that will get my brain working again but the other part of me doesn't want this season to end. Just being able to hang out with our kiddos all day is pretty dang awesome. I don't think I could ever be fully a stay at home mom, but these last few weeks have been very needed for my sanity and to heal from his birth. 

Week Five. 

Baby Sullivan | Week Four

Today we find ourselves at week four of having Baby Sullivan with us. We are getting into the groove of things and our days are slowly starting resemble some sort of routine with two kids. I am super thankful for all of the family members that have been taking Marin for outings during the day when I feel a little overwhelmed by having two kiddos. It's good for her to get out of the house and go on lots of adventures. It also gives me the time to really spend time with Sullivan with no interruptions.

I am finally off of antibiotics and my c-section incision is finally healing up nicely. I'm driving now. I am vacuuming my house once more. Hallelujah. I have yet to take a nice long soak in a bathtub but I think that will occur sometime in the next week or so. I really miss my baths. 

We had a number of firsts this past week as well. We gave Sully his first official bath. He wasn't totally thrilled but didn't cry at all. Marin was there to help, of course. I am always trying to find ways to have her help me out...grab me a diaper....can you hand me that burp rag....will you pick out his outfit for the day? I know this transition hasn't been the easiest on her so I try to involve her in every way that I can. 

We also had one night where Sullivan slept all night. I fed him around 9:30pm or so and then we put him down. The next thing I know, I hear him on the monitor and look at my clock to only see it say 5:30am! I was shocked. We haven't had a stretch of sleep like that pretty much ever with him. I was very uncomfortable though because I hadn't nursed for an extended period of time, but I was very thankful for some uninterrupted sleep. 

We are planning on going on a date night this week for my birthday and to see the Dark Tower movie. That will be really the first time I've been away from him for an extended period of time. I'm confident he will be in great hands but I need to work on pumping to build up a supply for these type of occasions. I'm also getting my nails done on Wednesday and will be away from him for a bit there. It's all part of the process and I need to have some time to take care of myself. As the quote says, "You can't pour from an empty cup." 

Week Four. 

Happy Birthday, Little One

At this time last year, we were all hunkered down in our living room. I was trying to keep down scrambled eggs and we watched episode after episode of Dirty Jobs. My water had broken, conveniently when I went to the bathroom and not in our bedsheets around three in the morning. We had anticipated this day for nearly 10 months. I was overdue by 10 days. I knew that if I didn't go into labor today, then the doctors would intervene, against our wishes. I knew that our baby would come into this world in due time but it was almost as if she camping out until the very last second, just a little longer, just one more day. I probably gained another ten pounds just in the ten days we waited past our due date for her to arrive.

I knew going into labor that we wanted to take the natural approach if at all possible. We had an amazing doula by our side. You can read more about our birth story HERE. For as long as I shall live I will never forget the pain and exertion it took to bring Marin into this world. It was so real, so intense, yet almost an out of body experience. I will never forget the waves of contractions and pushing for what felt like an eternity. I will never forget hearing that Marin was turned differently than they had hoped and that was why I had been pushing for so long without really getting anywhere. There was talk of a C-Section.  Luckily, the support I had around me didn't let us get to that point and we were able to deliver Marin into this world still as naturally as possible.

She arrived into this world in a flash of pain and was rushed away from me. I remember hearing her cry. I remember thinking that it wasn't all real, that we were still laboring and in the process. They brought her next to my chest for only a brief second and then she was rushed away to NICU. Our little baby girl. The day our lives changed completely. The day everything was turned completely upside down and sideways. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Today Marin turns one. I can hardly believe that I am writing those words. I feel like I blinked and here we are. It's as if all of those sleepless nights and early mornings are so far away now. She now sleeps through the night. She now eats solid food, all the while throwing at least half of the contents from her plate onto to the floor around her. She is close to walking but seems to want to hold onto crawling just a little bit longer.

OUR LITTLE GIRL IS ONE TODAY. 

I am very far from the person I was one year ago. I have battle scars upon my body from the months of her stretching and growing. The weight is still coming off ever so slowly and I have to fight for that so much harder than before. Sleep is a luxury that I don't really miss that much. Nap times are when I am most productive and conquer the world. I have learned how to fearlessly and utterly be attached to another human that isn't my husband. I look into the mirror and the person staring back at me is no longer just a musician or an artist. I am a mother.

I AM A MOTHER.

In all of my years, I never thought that realization would be solidified within me. Now I don't desire to know a life without that piece of me. I am more complete now than I have ever been.

Happy Birthday, Little One. I am forever thankful that you turned out lives upside down.

Baby Marin | Week Fifty One

One more week until Marin is one. I just sent out the invite for her birthday bash. I am debating whether or not we should get her a smash cake or just a cupcake. I've already bought her way too many birthday gifts over the past few months. 

The weather has been abnormally amazing for February and we took full advantage of that earlier today. We haven't been out in the jogging stroller in far too long. Most of the time, the stroller just sits in our living room and our cat uses it as a hiding place when he is running away from our crazy baby. But, today I decided to pack us a lunch, bring my camera, and we walked to the park that is literally right across the way from us. 

I need to get our kid out more into the world, into nature. I want her to be the type of child that plays outside any chance she gets, dirty knees, sun kissed, and only coming in when the street lights start coming on. We played outside a lot when we were younger. I want Marin to not be cooped up in the house all day. I can tell she isn't outside enough. She's still not sure of grass and leaves. She is finally old enough to crawl around through the grass and she is constantly on a path of discovery. 

We ate our lunch in the sunshine. I would like many more days like this one. 

Baby Marin. Week Fifty One. 

Baby Marin | Week Fifty

2 more weeks. 2 more weeks until our little baby is a one year old. This time last year, I was big and pregnant and waiting for her arrival. February 8th was my due date. We went far past that day and Marin took her precious time in getting here. We waited until ten days past my due date. We did lots of waiting, and wondering, and waiting some more. 

Marin and I try to make a trip to see the Great Grandparents once a week or so, as our schedule allows. I always love going down. It gets us out of the house and she always has fun. We usually have lunch and play on the floor. We usually make the trek down after her morning nap and hang out until right before her afternoon nap. That's what we did today, although as I write this, she is supposed to be taking a nap and I can hear her playing around in her crib. Go to sleep, child. 

Marin has been fighting a gnarly cold the past few weeks. Her nose finally has stopped running constantly but she now has a lovely cough instead. Having a sick baby is a tough thing. She really hasn't been sick at all yet, so this feels like new territory. It's tough when they can't tell you what's going on and you just make sure they are comfortable and cozy. I am ready for this sickness to be out of house. 

(She wasn't quite sure about the Cabbage Patch doll.) 

Baby Marin. Week Fifty. 

2 more weeks. 

Baby Marin | Week Forty Nine

This week has been full of baby drool, baby snot, and working on baby teeth. We resorted back to wearing bibs for a while because this little gal is a drool producing factory at the moment. I believe she is working on a few more teeth. Marin hates having her nose cleaned out and wiped off. She battles against the Kleenex every single time. I can't wait until we get to the point of where she knows how to blow her nose. For now, we are all kind of snotty messes around these parts. 

I feel like Marin is so close to walking. Part of me isn't ready for that, it is all going so fast! She will stand on her own every once in a while and then quickly realizes what she is doing and she falls back to the floor. One day she is just going to walk and surprise us all, including herself. 

Also, these photos should be proof of the toy destruction that is usually found in our basement. Building blocks, toy pianos, baby dolls, stuffed animals. Everything must be out on the floor and should never be in the nice baskets that we have for the toys. That's at least Marin's philosophy on all of it. 

I only have a few more of these posts before we hit one year. I am trying to decide what my next plan is with the Marin photos. Creating these posts every week has been pretty time consuming. But, they do help me get out my camera and actually use it even within the chaos that is our life. There is never a dull moment when Marin is involved. 

I feel like this could be Marin's first "Selfie." 

Week Forty Nine. 

Baby Marin | Week Forty Eight

"Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it."  

Proverbs 22:6 NLT 

Music runs through our family's veins, it is in our bones. Even when we go through seasons where we aren't playing music as often as we once did, in our younger, childless years, we still always find it and it always finds us. I believe that Marin has music in her as well. She dances. She sings. She lights up whenever music is playing anywhere we are. 

The day will come in the not so far off future when I will sit down at the piano with Marin and teach her just like my grandma taught me. She will probably have those moments of watching the clock during practice and long for the time when she can go out and play with her friends. But, maybe in the further future, she will feel the freedom of playing in front of and with a group of people for the first time. She will feel the heat and nervousness but then also the moment of realizing that she is doing something truly special. There's nothing like it. 

Maybe she will be a drummer. Maybe she will play guitar. Maybe she will play piano. Maybe she will sing. Maybe she will write songs. 

I can't wait to see her love for music grow and morph. 

Week Forty Eight. 

Baby Marin | Week Forty Seven (11 Months)

Tomorrow Marin will be 11 months. We are barreling quickly towards having a one year old. I don't have a ton to say today other than the fact that she is growing like crazy and is keeping me on my toes. Marin loves to get into EVERYTHING. I can't blink without her crawling across the room and going straight for something electronic. 

She has decided that she no longer likes bananas and turned up her nose this afternoon at sweet potatoes. We are still trying all sorts of new foods, which is an adventure in itself. 

(Marin's hat is from Ember Kid.) 

Nap times have been hit and miss this week. She has been taking great morning naps but the afternoon naps have been a bit of a struggle. She's moving around in her crib as I write this. I have had to move the baby monitor way out of her reach. 

Baby Marin. Week Forty Seven. 

Baby Marin | Week Forty Six

I am becoming more and more aware of how soon Marin will be a one year old. My brain almost can't grasp that quite yet. I've been slowly figuring out what gifts we will give her. I want there to be a  smash cake. It will be here before we know it. 

Marin has finally mastered the art of feeding herself. I feel like we have been working on this for a while now but one day she just started picking food up and feeding herself. It was like something just clicked for her all of sudden. My current struggle is trying to figure out all of the things that I should feed her and then all of the things that she will eat. Marin eating food is great but there have been a few moments where the simplicity of breast feeding sounds so great but also so long ago. 

Whenever Marin hears music she starts dancing. That's probably my favorite quirk of hers. This girl loves music. Coming from two musician parents, we are obviously ecstatic and can't wait for the day that I begin teaching her how to play the piano or when she will get her first set of drums. Music is in her blood and I am forever thankful. 

Baby gates have become my best friend. Every morning, I pick up the house. I've been letting Marin roam the floor while I put away dishes and wipe up baby messes. She loves "helping" with emptying the dishwasher, has found a new love for anything that is stuck on the fridge, and still loves trying to escape out the kitty door. One day she will surprise us and just start walking around. It will happen soon. 

We also tried the nursery at church this past Sunday. She was fine when we left but only made it about 3/4 of the way through the service. I think it was pretty overwhelming for her to be around twenty other babies. Her existence usually consists of her family and her cousin. That's it. We will still keep trying because I know it's good for her to be around other littles, but we had some pretty epic tears on Sunday. Tomorrow will be a new day and we will try again. 

Week Forty Six.